Updated: Nov 16, 2021
Boys are tough, especially the boys in my little tribe! I have 3, each with their own different personality to match. I have one that's extra tough, one that's extra sweet, and one that's extra wild...
So we have to approach each child in a different way about similar things, sounds tough right?
At the beginning we struggled, but have since grown as parents and have come to realize that even though they have distinct personalities and we deal with them in various ways, the objection is all the same!
BUILD THEM UP!!!!
Being a little boy is hard enough with all the "boy stereotypes".
“There’s this myth that boys don’t have as many feelings or they’re not as emotional,” says Rachel Busman, PsyD, a senior clinical psychologist at the Child Mind Institute. “These are misperceptions. We need to be more nurturing of our boys, as well.”
So I make it my business to build my sweet boys up every chance I get, its simple things that make a difference in our children
No pressure, right? Don’t worry - building a child’s confidence doesn’t have to be an intimidating or complicated task. In fact, you can make it fun!
Below I have listed all the ways we build our boys up:
We Practice Daily Affirmations
Both adults and children often engage in negative self-talk among themselves: "What is wrong with me?", or "I can't do this," or "I suck at____."
When I hear one of my son's saying something like this, I usually jump right in and remind them of our affirmations!
Model and teach these things to your children to build up their confidence! My boys and I look in the mirror and we say things like:
I get better at things I practice
I am a great problem solver
I can do hard things
I strive to do my best
When I fail, I say "I can't do it YET" and try again
I can learn anything
I am a strong person
I go after my dreams
We Help them overcome the fear of failure
The fear of failure often prevents children from trying their best and reaching their fullest potential, which can naturally diminish confidence.
I help my boys overcome the fear of failure by teaching them that mistakes are acceptable and a normal part of life and that people rarely achieve success without challenges.
I remember the first day my oldest son started swimming class. He was so afraid of not only the water, but also of not being able to learn how to swim!
I sat him to the side, reminded him of his affirmations, and told him how baby birds never fly until they jump out the nest! Meaning in order to fly (swim) you have to be willing to take that first step out of your comfort zone (nest). Now I'm proud to announce that he is swimming like a champ!
We Play With Them
Joining in on our children's playtime Is something that is necessary when trying to build them up. Playing with them sends the message that they are important and worthy of our time.
Now, although I'm not always available right away, I make sure I promise my child that my husband or I will be right in to play with them as soon as we can and we keep that promise.
During playtime we allow our boys to choose the activity as well as lead in it, for example:
Our oldest son usually wants to play the video game together or a board game, so we will let him choose and take the lead on either task.
Our middle child usually likes to do a bundle of different things. One minute we may be playing dinosaurs, followed by race cars, then after that we may have a dance party, then we will end by playing store.
Sometimes we randomly jump in on whatever game they are already playing.
Whatever they want to play we take the time out and play with them even if its just for a few minutes.